Ever do crack? I ask candidate Nikki Benz. It’s an automatic question these days.
“No. No. I don’t even smoke cigarettes,” she tells me, tossing a honey-blond tress. You could swim in those hazel eyes.
“When it comes to that kind of stuff,” she says, “my life is not very exciting.”
Nikki’s job is another thing. Unless you’ve been comatose or away at bible camp, you know Nikki Benz is among the world’s top porn stars.
She divides her time between shooting Bra Busters 4 and the like in L.A. and her mom’s place in Etobicoke, where she grew up not far from Rob Ford’s spread.
So she is eligible for Toronto politics. In fact, her career makes her highly qualified, since it, too, involves screwing people while huffing and puffing and pretending to smile.
“At least I’m honest and transparent. No hidden agenda,” says Ms Benz.
Noon Wednesday, she is to sashay down to City Hall and officially launch her campaign for mayor.
Already, she has a snappy slogan — Trade in Your Ford for a Benz — and the beginnings of a platform.
She dropped by the Sun to outline some of her positions, politically speaking.
Her transit policy is a bit all-over-the-map, but whose isn’t? Generally, she favours cheaper modes, so LRT in the suburbs. But she would fast-track the relief line. Frankly, she says “relief line” in a much more compelling way than John Tory.
I can tell you Toronto’s congestion was not eased by her photo shoot on King St. with our Craig Robertson. For once, no one cursed or flipped the bird.
This is overreaching a mayor’s powers, but Ms Benz proposes making National Masturbation Day a civic holiday. I know, I know, I hear you, every day should be National Masturbation Day, but Benz sees it as a way to soothe Toronto’s chronic angst.
Also, since we’re already Hollywood North, Nikki would make us Debbie Does Dallas North.
“My industry is one of the biggest in the world,” she says. “It could do for Toronto what it’s done for L.A. in jobs, business and taxes.”
In fact, Nikki Benz is a conglomerate unto herself, with busy web business, a slew of pornos for the Brazzers brand, feature dances at strip joints, and T-shirts.
She planned on law at York U and pole-danced to raise tuition, then found strippers can make more than lawyers. No ditzy blond., our Nikki.
She insists she’s running because “I love my hometown,” but the publicity sure won’t hurt her porn market share.
At the Sun she’s in black pumps and a summery dress that is simple but bursting to be set freeeee.
“Everyone expects me to be in lingerie 24 hours a day,” she says.
Perhaps this explains why she ran away with my poll on her other campaign slogan, Toronto’s Sexiest Mayoral Candidate.
At press time, she led with 44.1% of votes to Karen Stintz’s 18.9% and Ravishing Rob Ford’s 12.5%
Sketchy the Clown was fourth and closing fast at 11.6%. If it counted, and we had proportional voting, Sketchy the Clown might be budget chief. Or maybe he already is.
But polls are for strippers. What do we gain by replacing an (alleged) crack smoker with a (no-ifs-about-it) porn star?
“There’s notoriety and stigma to both, don’t get me wrong,” says Benz. “But porn is legal. Crack isn’t.
“(Porn) doesn’t cloud your mind for decisions or making statements. And there’ll be no surprises with me. Everything you want to know is online, as long as you’re 18.”
I can think of two big reasons not to write her off.
First, she has racked up, so to speak, more electoral victories than John Tory, having been Penthouse Pet of the Year in 2011.
Also, she has 642,000 Twitter followers, swamping the world’s most infamous mayor, who has 161,000, Prime Minister Stephen Harper (470,000) and Grit pretty boy Justin Trudeau (370,000).
I bet Nikki Benz makes prime minister before Rob Ford does.
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